Patient Discipleship in Small Places

We live in an instant society. Everything has to be quick. Gone are the days of waiting for much of anything. From the new revolutionary diets we are on that guarantee quick weight loss results, to the ordering we do online—we want it now. Almost everything is a click away. Even the days of waiting for your sister to pick out a movie at Blockbuster are gone. Now you just pull up your queue and instantly watch the movie of your choice.

But this is not how discipleship works. In fact, most lasting things aren’t instant. They are lasting because they are accomplished through years of commitment, suffering, and toil. Growth in the Christian life happens over the course of a lifetime. There are moments of quick growth, to be sure. But for most of us, the Christian life is three steps forward, one step back. If we are honest, for many of us, growth happened quickly when we first trusted Christ, but since then it’s been slow, steady, and often disappointing. If this is true of us as ministry leaders whose calling is to be in the Word more than most, how much more is it true for those we are called to shepherd? 

One of the dangers of living in an instant society is losing patience. We have been conditioned to expect things immediately, and I’m afraid this attitude has crept into the church through various avenues. It is slowly chipping away at the notion of life as pilgrims on a journey to the celestial city, with ups and downs, highs and lows, victories and failures. We can be tempted to treat those we are discipling like a consumer platform and expect change and growth at the click of a button. We must resist this. 

Just as we can grow to appreciate a sometimes-slower pace in small-town life, we can grow to appreciate God’s slow but steady plan for disciple-making. Here are three reminders that I hope can help us cultivate patience in our disciple-making:  

1. Remember God’s sovereignty

God is in the business of illuminating hearts and minds to understand and obey his truth. He is also in the business of doing this as he sees fit (Luke 24:45; 2 Corinthians 4:6). Yes, people are responsible before the Lord, but at the end of the day, any growth we have is attributable to him, as he moves us from one degree of glory to the next. He is the potter and we are the clay. As we think back on our own growth in the Christian life, I believe we can all attest to the fact that God has used many of our failures and slowness of heart to mature us. As we are tempted to be impatient with those we are discipling and as we encourage them in their growth, we must remember that God is in control.

2. Remember God’s grace

Romans 5:8 reminds us that “God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Not when we got our act together. Not when we stopped doing this, that, or the other thing. While we were still sinners, Christ died for us. What good and glorious news! However, we are often tempted to become frustrated and impatient with those we are discipling, all the while forgetting the Lord’s posture towards his people: grace and love. Think of the grace and patience the Lord showed toward his disciples who regularly missed the mark and didn’t get it. He didn’t cast them aside, but patiently loved and discipled them to find their hope, security, and rest in him.

3.  Remember how far God’s grace has brought you

Think back over your spiritual life. It hasn’t always been a stellar performance, has it? Maybe you’ve been like the younger prodigal, who ran as far as he could get from the Lord. Maybe you’re like the older brother, who outwardly did everything right, but inwardly despised the grace his younger brother received. Or maybe you’ve been a combination of both. But look at the Father’s posture towards both in Luke 15. He treats both sons the same way he treats us, with grace and patience. He meets us where we are and calls us to celebrate the grace provided by his Son. This amazing grace saves sinners like you, me, and those we are discipling. 

Life in the Family of God

I have a wonderful wife and five wonderful children. We don’t have a home that is filled with strife, but it is filled with seven sinners who want things to go a certain way. We often lose patience with one another and have to ask forgiveness for our impatience and seek to move forward with grace and love. Whatever church we have the privilege to shepherd is also a family filled with sinners who want things to work a certain way. This is why Paul says in Ephesians 4:1-3 to “…walk in a manner worthy of the calling to which you have been called, with all humility and gentleness, with patience, bearing with one another in love, eager to maintain the unity of the Spirit in the bond of peace.” This is our call, our mandate. This will only come about as we submit to the Lord Jesus Christ, as we continually receive and share his grace with our brothers and sisters, and as we seek to make disciples of Jesus Christ.

As Jesus tells us at the end of the Gospel of John, “Peace be with you. As the Father has sent me, even so I am sending you.” We are called, by the power of the Spirit, to minister the way our Lord ministered while on earth. There are a lot of things this means, but one thing is for certain. We are called and commanded throughout the Scriptures to patiently shepherd those in our care.


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Nate Oliver

Nate Oliver is Senior Pastor of The Federated Church of Willington. He has a passion to communicate God’s Word faithfully in order to help others grow in their worship of and service to our Lord Jesus. He met and married his best friend, Tracey, and God has blessed them with five children – Madison, James, Marybeth, Luke, and Hannah.